I was going through a bad divorce, I was living in Mexico back then, as my ex-husband is Mexican. I felt so lonely and missed my family very much. I was looking forward to ending all this nightmare and wanted more than anything to go back to the US with my family. Back then my daughter was 9 years old, and she was able to understand what was going on. We were both going through a rough period.
During our last months in Mexico City, our moods were completely down, so I decided to take her to a therapist, I knew she needed to talk to someone about what she was going through. She was keeping a lot to her self, as she didn't want me to worry, she's always been a great girl, very mature for her age, and I felt completely heartbroken that I was not able to give her emotional stability. As a parent there is nothing you want more for your children, than happiness. A good friend recommended this therapist, who specialized on children and teenagers. So I got an appointment for her and she was excited to go. So we went to the appointment. I met with the therapist first to meet him and then my daughter went in. After 45 minutes she comes out with a big smile and shakes the therapist hand and runs towards me.
During our ride home, we talked about how she felt during therapy, and she said exactly this "He is really nice Mom, I felt comfortable talking to him, but he is sick Mom, he won't live long, so we better look for someone else". I was silent for a couple of minutes, trying to process what she said and after a few minutes I asked her "Sweetie, did he tell you he is sick?"- "No Mom, but he looks sick, his eyes look sad". We went home in silence.
I hand no sleep that night, I was really confused. She had never said anything like this before. I concluded that maybe this was a way of telling me that she didn't want to continue going to therapy, or that maybe she was not comfortable with the the therapist. I tried addressing the subject the next day, and she was evasive, she was like this the entire week.
So, it was Thursday again, and she had her appointment with the therapist again. She got in the car calmly and we drove in silence. We arrived to the Therapist office, and a lady opened the door, she asked me, if she could talk in private with me, my daughter sat on on the reception chair, there was a weird look on her face. I was taken to a small private room next to the reception.
The lady introduced her self as the therapist colleague, and she said. "Mrs. XX, I'm sorry we were not able to get in touch with you before, there is no easy way to say this, but Dr. YY just passed away in his office. I didn't want to say this in front of your daughter, I know she's dealing with a difficult situation now. The forensic team is in Dr. YY's office, I kindly ask you to forgive the situation, but it will be best if you take your daughter away from here, if you consider appropriate to tell her what happened, it should be in a safe space for her to take in the news, I will contact you as soon as possible. Thank you for your understanding". I shook her cold hand, and went looking for my daughter, she was standing right next to the door, ready to leave. She knew we were not staying, this freaked me.
We got in the car and as soon as I closed the door, she turned and looked at me with a serene expression and said "He is fine Mom, he is resting now, he said goodbye as he walked out the door". I felt terrified and puzzled. I said nothing. We drove back home and never spoke of it again.
This is the only time she has mentioned something like this. Many years later I asked her about that episode, I asked how did she knew that Dr. YY was going to pass away, she has no explanation for it. She says that "his eyes were sad, and that for some reason, during the first and only therapy session, her head kept saying "he is really sick, he is dying"".
I hand no sleep that night, I was really confused. She had never said anything like this before. I concluded that maybe this was a way of telling me that she didn't want to continue going to therapy, or that maybe she was not comfortable with the the therapist. I tried addressing the subject the next day, and she was evasive, she was like this the entire week.
So, it was Thursday again, and she had her appointment with the therapist again. She got in the car calmly and we drove in silence. We arrived to the Therapist office, and a lady opened the door, she asked me, if she could talk in private with me, my daughter sat on on the reception chair, there was a weird look on her face. I was taken to a small private room next to the reception.
The lady introduced her self as the therapist colleague, and she said. "Mrs. XX, I'm sorry we were not able to get in touch with you before, there is no easy way to say this, but Dr. YY just passed away in his office. I didn't want to say this in front of your daughter, I know she's dealing with a difficult situation now. The forensic team is in Dr. YY's office, I kindly ask you to forgive the situation, but it will be best if you take your daughter away from here, if you consider appropriate to tell her what happened, it should be in a safe space for her to take in the news, I will contact you as soon as possible. Thank you for your understanding". I shook her cold hand, and went looking for my daughter, she was standing right next to the door, ready to leave. She knew we were not staying, this freaked me.
We got in the car and as soon as I closed the door, she turned and looked at me with a serene expression and said "He is fine Mom, he is resting now, he said goodbye as he walked out the door". I felt terrified and puzzled. I said nothing. We drove back home and never spoke of it again.
This is the only time she has mentioned something like this. Many years later I asked her about that episode, I asked how did she knew that Dr. YY was going to pass away, she has no explanation for it. She says that "his eyes were sad, and that for some reason, during the first and only therapy session, her head kept saying "he is really sick, he is dying"".
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